It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
