Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
its not stalking. its research.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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