Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
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