today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
