You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
why didn't you poke me back
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
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