Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
