All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize