i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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