that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
