you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
