I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize