I'm laying in your front yard are you home
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
