smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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