CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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