in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Houston, we have a squirter
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
