There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
