u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
