I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
