I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
