How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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