Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Randomize
