Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
