he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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