hotel room ftw
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize