Tell her she can't have a vagina
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I'm just crazy horny about you
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
