she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
