while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
