we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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