i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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