o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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