Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
