Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
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