Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
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