oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
soo... how was my night?
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
