Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
