So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Never underestimate the power of titties
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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