Where is the hickey?
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
