I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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