did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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