But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
