her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Randomize
