Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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