It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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