You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
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