she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Randomize
