D3 body, D1 cock
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
