so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
