i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
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