Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize
