Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
