My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
